The first couple of years into marriage are delightful. Romance and passion ignite your world and you get pampered like never before. You understand the true value of companionship and look forward to those blissful tender moments. Your life abounds with cute gestures like cooking favourite meals, buying gifts for no reason and sending love texts throughout the day. You wish you could stagnate time and maintain the status quo forever.
However, as time progresses, the romance takes a backseat. You get swamped with responsibilities and conflicts start making a place in your relationship. Kids, in-laws, work, travel etc. leave you exhausted both mentally and physically. What inadvertently suffers is your relationship with your significant other. It happens gradually and it seeps deeper even before you know it.
The good news is that the charming old romance can be revived. If you dig deeper, you would realise that love and bonding are still there and has only gone into hiding. With willingness and conscious efforts in the direction, you can rekindle your relationship.
Here is what you can do to bring back the excitement and intimacy in your stale marriage.
7 Ways to revive the lost romance in your marriage
Communicate your feelings
We often underestimate the power of meaningful conversations. A heart-to-heart can go a long way in bringing a positive change in your lives. The key is to be gentle and non-judgemental in the way you approach this issue. Do not blame your spouse for giving you less time or taking you for granted. Instead, suggest ways to bring back the magic in your life. Put forth a few ideas like “Let’s give each other more time” or “Let’s bring a few changes in our married life.” Your partner will be more welcoming of your suggestions if he/she is not blamed for the situation.
Go on dates
Wasn’t dating a fun time? When you would sneak out some precious hours to spend some quality time with your date. What connected you back then can certainly reconnect you now. You don’t have to go to expensive places or plan an entire day’s outing. The idea to take out 1-2 exclusive hours in a week for your spouse. You can simply take a walk in the park or talk your heart out after putting your kids to bed. Remember the fun times you have had in the past and exchange what is happening in your lives. Indulge in meaningful conversations to connect on an emotional level and get closer again.
Not because you are not beautiful in your skin but because positive actions breed positive reactions. You may have started neglecting yourself under the burden of your responsibilities. It is understandable that you are left with little time amidst juggling work, kids and home. However, making little efforts in this direction can bring a sea change. Dress up for your husband or wife just so that your efforts get noticed. Throw out your old pyjamas if you have started living in them. Visit a salon for that long overdue haircut. Get your mojo back so that attraction finds its way into your marriage again.
Do little things
You really don’t have to go out of the way to express your love. Small little acts of love can do the job equally well. Leave little love notes around, make breakfast in bed, get flowers to get close and intimate again. Complete a chore that your spouse normally does or just offer a back massage. These are a few thoughtful examples of showing that you care. Trust me, a few times of doing this and it will get reciprocated.
Go on a holiday
A vacation is the best way to ensure that both of you spend all your time together. It will also give you a chance to see your partner in a different context. Of course, you have seen him at his best and his worst, but a change in environment will let you discover newer things.
Arguments will always happen and avoiding them can do more damage than you can imagine. However, judging the right time and using the right words can make a world of difference. Firstly, you don’t have to have an immediate argument. Wait for the right time and bring the topic up with all your compassion. Use the tone you would talk in with a friend or a colleague.
Dust off your old lingerie and take the first step. It will make your partner feel desirable and loved. Needless to say, it is one of the best ways to bring back the fire in your marriage.
Happiness in marriage is essential to living a peaceful life. However, it can run into choppy waters at times. The best way to come out of it is through communication and making more time for each other. Remember why and when you fell in love. It will remind you of beautiful times spent together. With the tips given above, you can revive the lost spice in your married life.